Enroute from Zanzibar, Tanzania
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July 2009
FINALLY! The boxes are gone, the food has all been given away. FINALLY done with packing. It feels so great. Time to enjoy this city and this night. And tomorrow: ATHENS GREECE!!!! Wooo hoooo!
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Because I will not be posting any new pics for a while (until I get myself a new computer), I've linked to Cyn's album from this Monday's night out =)
Thank you Miss Cyn! You are the bestest husband/friend in the world.
Album is here.
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It’s Tuesday. I’m supposed to be moved out of my flat by Saturday morning and hopping on a plane to Athens to see Miss Maria. I am IN AN INTERNET cafe (I still can’t get over how Dark Ages it feels, especially since I worked for THE tech company just a month ago!) and procrastinating all the packing that I have to do. I’ve realized that even if you’re NOT working, procrastination still applies. You procrastinate all the things that are just a tad less interesting than the rest. And right now, packing is the least interesting thing on my list of things to do.
Anyway, it is cloudy in London and even though I should be annoyed that my last few days aren’t spent in gorgeous sunshine, the immature part of me is gleeful to be leaving this city when it’s cloudy. It helps me to distance myself from the London that I will love love love forever and ever and ever.
We’ve been taking time to enjoy little bits of it these last few days. Went to the National Portrait Gallery on Monday in between errands. Last night we attended a Tchaikovsky piano concerto at the Royal Albert Hall as part of this summer’s BBC Proms. Tonight, dinner with friends. Tomorrow, more coffees and lunches and dinners and packing.
I love this city. And I always will. My mom says that it’s always important to leave a place/job on a high. You want to leave loving it so that you will always come back, so that you will always have fond memories and warm words to say when you speak of your past. This makes sense. But it also makes it a bit harder to leave. It’s hard to walk away from a good thing. But it is the necessary thing to do if you want a chance to discover a great thing.
I am nostalgic, excited, anxious, stressed. But as I take these next few days to pack up (yet again) and prepare myself for another adventure, I’ve come to realize a few important things:
A house is not a home without the love, the music, the colour and the friendship that brightens its walls. The flat is a mess and as gorgeous as it is, it no longer feels like our home. Cynthia is gone. Our pictures our down. Our books are packed. It is just another flat in great big London. It’s emptiness gives me a wonderful sense of comfort. I will always have Cynthia in my life. And we can always build a home, wherever we happen to be, in whatever part of the world.
Work is work. People are what matter. Seeing some friends from work on Monday night for birthday drinks was lovely. I’ve missed them! A lot! It was all smiles and laughter and gossip. Hugs and kisses and inside jokes. I will miss them so much. But I didn’t miss the work and I don’t think I ever will. People make our lives. Not careers, not incomes, not prestige or promotions. People are what count.
Technology is necessary. I cannot live without it ever again. Three weeks in the African bush WITHOUT Internet has been the most torturous experience ever. I feel mute without a keyboard! I tried to keep a journal but became impatient with my own writing speed. I need a computer and the Internet. Always. I am a techno-geek and so proud of it. NEVER again will I be without my own computer. It is my bridge to the world and to all the people that I connect with on an hourly basis.
Fear is the absence of Faith. My Mom always reminds me of this. I’ve been all over the place in my head these last few weeks. I’ve put myself on this ridiculous roller coaster ride. Fear and excitement. Fear and excitement. All the unknowns bring so much possibility but unknowns are scary. Then the faith kicks in and I remember that it will all turn out amazing in the end. It will be a pivotal year. I know it.
At the very core, all that matters are your family and friends. In the bitter cold of the Zambian night, with no warm water, in all the dirt and mud, I didn’t wish for my bed or 700 thread count sheets. I didn’t care about a warm house or carpeted floors. All I wanted was a direct phone line to my Mom and girl friends so that I could laugh/cry/complain about the whole absurd experience of camping in the middle of winter in the Southern Hemisphere. I missed their love and laughter even more than warm water!!!!
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I think everyone should go out and buy a lottery ticket. It's a lucky day, month, year. =)
I'm 27 years old today. And it doesn't feel any different. Last year at this time, I was dancing naked in the sea with my girl friends. We're going to repeat this tradition, but one week late.
This year's birthday is different. So many unknowns. So many possibilities and a whole lot of space and time to figure out what's next. I have felt a bit unmoored – in the best and scariest of ways. So many things to sort through in my head, so many things to plan out, and so many challenges to face.
I have complete freedom.
Sometimes I can't really fathom this fact.
I HAVE COMPLETE FREEDOM.
How amazing is that?
It will be a wonderful wonderful year. =)
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It's Saturday in London. It's warm, the sun is shining and I AM SITTING IN AN INTERNET CAFE! Isn't that terrible? AN INTERNET CAFE. I am paying for internet while in London! It SUCKS being so cut off from technology. I feel like someone has cut a limb off. =)
So, Africa. It was amazing, rough, hard, dirty, mind expanding and a whole other world. Taking a shower today in my London flat, washing away the whole city of Nairobi from my skin and hair, felt incredible. A shower, a bed, HOT WATER, clean sheets. Perspective. No other trip has given me such perspective before.
I have so much to reflect on when it comes to this trip. Three weeks felt like months. Emotionally, it was up and down and around. But all of it was magnificent. Waking up at dawn, descending into the Ngorogoro Crater, watching the most breathtaking sunsets and appreciating the warmth of campfires at night. So many random little beautiful moments set against the rawest of backgrounds.
I am changed, tired, dirty, excited, scared, inspired. I am everything mixed into one. I miss home, I miss adventure, I want a nest, I want to fly. I want it all, and all at once.
There is lots to sort through now. Places to see, people to meet, plans to hatch and execute on. Each day I want something different. All this freedom! All this time! It is a blessing. A daunting blessing.
What is next in this great big adventure I've thrown myself into? =)
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OMG – SUN and WARMTH. FINALLY! My spirits are up. We are in Zanzibar. White beaches, moorish architecture, dodgy food stalls and fresh sugar cane juice. Feels so nice to be wandering in sandals again after such cold nights in Zambia and Malawi.
Safari-ing has been tough work but it feels so nice to have been away for nearly two weeks. My mind and body are relaxed. Stress is a distant memory. I feel free, happy, relaxed, healthy.
Zanzibar reminds me of Marakesh but not as colourful. Lots of Arabic influences and the moorish architecture is beautiful. Tomorrow we are spending the day on the beach. I CANNOT WAIT. =)
More updates again soon.
Gawd, I MISS THE INTERNET!!!! =)
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And I am ALIVE!!!!
It's been a week since I've been in Africa. And it has been nothing like I expected.
First, Zambia was FREEZING cold. Thank goodness we're out of there. Zambia is poor. 7 out of 10 people have HIV and the life expectancy is 31 years old! Gosh. We had a few days in Livingstone. We visited Victoria Falls. It is incredible! It is one of the natural wonders of the world. Such a beautiful experience.
Malawi feels more like Asia than Africa. The lake feels like the ocean and there are lush mountains and jungles everywhere. It's much warmer here, thank goodness. I managed to catch the flu a few days ago and am recovering quite quickly thanks to the weather. These last few days have been spent lounging on the beach, visiting schools and properly relaxing before going up to Tanzania tomorrow.
I AM DEFINITELY not a camper. =) But am happy to have this experience going through the real Africa. Will have more insights soon. I am feeling too drugged to be more eloquent.
Much love from Malawi!
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Mom and I were having dinner at the cafe right near this valley. I guess the ferry from Capri had just docked and everyone was walking back to the main town. Hundreds of people. The crowd slowly snaked their way up the town walls and I took a shot.
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